Weddings - Keeping it Real n Simple

"Who are all these people? I hardly know them, they are smiling up at me yes but... where on earth did I meet them? Do you know them darling"

"No, I actually thought they were your guests, but try not to show surprise!!

So runs the thoughts of most couples as they match into the reception hall. Seriously, go ahead and ask them they will tell you!

Going for the Kill
Ugandan weddings are thus characterised. When one is set to walk the aisle, wedding meeting invitations are sent out by the hundreds. Oh yah, you don’t even have to use your phone, just use the internet and automatic reminders are sent out. You need to read in between the lines the text actually says "come with your pocket, and make sure its loaded"

"Funny" thing is that its a "send to all" kinda thing so much so that long forgotten 'friends and acquaintances" are now being remembered for this honourable occassion. And if you don’t attend the meetings or submit cash you are surely NOT getting a wedding invitation. It’s thus clearly not about the person but the pocket - Get my drift?

"We thank you for your presents and your presence"
I know of three couples now that have the top most part of their wardrobes stuffed with so called wedding presents. Really, lets look at the gifts since some feel that it’s nice to have a big turn up hence presents.

Glasses, glasses, and more glasses, some with flowers and some plain some you won’t even be caught drinking from. Ok, let's not be so mean, there is more trays of all types, and mostly plastic, you know the ones with wooden designs. Have I forgotten cutlery, all types as well.

If you have someone really caring you might get off with a microwave, some blankets or a fridge (usually from parents) Oh I had forgotten, pictures too, big fat frames which don’t match with your decor and lots of albums for you to place your wedding pix.

So, now, you wanted lots of gifts, there you are!

The way I see it
Weddings are intimate occasions and its high time we stopped the hullabaloo and associated cost.

Honestly speaking all those millions of guests its pretty likely that they do not currently feature in your life (actively at least) nor will feature after. These are the very ones who will say eh...you mean they broke up, HEH!!! the wedding was expensive yet the union useless"

Oh wait there is more am not done yet, the same people who demand a huge wedding are the very ones who DO NOT contribute as much yet are the first to state "we did not even eat enough why did they make it huge yet could not give enough food"

Can Real and Simple work?
I got three classic cases

1) My brother Benda had a wedding reception with 25 people. Simply registered his marriage to Karen, and held a reception in Fang Fang with 25 people. Family and close friends, spent max of 2M

2) Another person had the wedding in church, and right outside had the reception. 5 crates of soda and that very evening took off for their honeymoon (by air!) and you thought??

3) This other guy was well to do, he had the pressure of the family to wed, got his lady and did just that on a working day. Then called those he wanted to a meal and introduced his wife. How is that for size?

Conclusion
Whilst we need to observe the cultures (kwanjula, kuhingira) we need to keep it real and simple. Especially when one does not have the bucks for it. Don’t kill yourself bwana.

See?